I Wanna Be Sedated
So, tomorrow is the day. Well, it's only just a day isn't it? As a friend said, it's an adventure! It's an adventure that only i can have huh? I will be sedated and in the words of my good friend Ilene "you won't give a shit"!
The procedure, i'm told will take about 30 minutes. Thats a very long time, but no time. I will be unaware of what is happening, i hope! I won't get into the exact position i will be in, but lets just say its not too comfy.
I fully intend to pig out afterwards, as i am not allowed to eat or drink after midnight tonight. My dream is a tremendous bagel with a fried egg and some form of cheese dripping down. My reality will probably be something much less interesting. A smoothie perhaps?
The Philips Ambulatory Care Center is where i will be. Here is one of their rules:
What to Bring – Escort Requirement for Ambulatory Surgery
If you are scheduled for Ambulatory Surgery (in other words, your physician has told you that you will return home following your procedure), you MUST have a responsible escort over 18 years of age take you home. If you are unable to arrange for an escort, you should discuss this with your physician before the date of surgery. Should an escort not be available on the day of surgery, your surgery will be cancelled.
Whats really cool is that it's near Whole Foods, Trader Joes and get this...One Lucky Duck. I am not anticipating any problems or a long recuperation.
In fact, i am most probably going to get my 4th tattoo on saturday! I won't tell you what it is yet, photos will be forthcoming though!
So, i guess if you feel so inclined, maybe a prayer or two for me would be nice! Just ask God dude to get me the heck out of there as fast as possible so i can get on with my life.
There are a couple of really cool recipes for green popcorn and crusty califlower that i came across. I am excited to try these! This weekend, perhaps!
So, you see life goes on! GOD dude is protecting me! How friggin cool is green popcorn? How friggin cool is crusty califlower? It's cool, believe me!
Here's a funny:
In the middle of an international gynecology conference, an English and a French gynecologist are discussing various cases they've recently treated.
French Gynecologist : "Only last week, zer was a woman ooh came to see me, and 'er cleetoris - eet was like a melon."
English Gynecologist : "Don't be absurd, it couldn't have been that big, my good man, she couldn't have been able to walk if it was."
French Gynecologist : "Aaah, you eenglish, zare you go again, always talkeeng about ze size... I was talkeeng about ze flavor..."
Here i am in a before photo! Nope, the surgery is not for my smelly armpits!!!
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