In The New Year.....

The Walkmen - In The New Year
Oh, I’m still living
At the old address
And I’m waiting on the weather
That I know will pass

I know that it’s true
It’s gonna be a good year
Out of the darkness
And into the fire
I tell you I love you
And my heart’s in the strangest place
That’s how it started
And that’s how it ends

Well I know you’re with me
It’s a point of pride
And it’s louder than lightning
In this room of mine

Oh, I’m just like you
I never hear the bad news
And I never will
We won by a landslide
Our troubles are over
My sisters are married to all of my friends
Yeah, that’s how it started

You took your sweet time
And I waited by without complaint
Til all the pipe dreams made me insane

So it’s all over
It’s all over anyhow
You took your sweet time
Finally, I opened my eyes

My friends and my family
They are asking of me:
“How long will you ramble?
"How long did you say it would be?"
Snow is still falling
I’m almost home
I’ll see you in the new year

This is my 196th post of 2008. I had hoped to hit 200 but i am cool with where i ended up. I have so many thoughts in my head its almost too much to comprehend. I don't think i can really put into words how i am feeling at this moment.

Resolutions? Nah. Not this time. Not this year. I know what i must do but if i shout it out loud it will be heard by too many people who will then come to me on December 31st 2009 to ask me what i accomplished? And if i didn't do everything i said i would do, well you know!!!

I will tell you this though, not a day will go by where i won't be thankful for what i have. Not one fucking day. I am not rich nor will i ever be, but i have a home and warmth and food and family and friends and most importantly i have love.

I am done. Mushy was never my strong suit. It just doesn't work for me.

I told Liz Lemon today that she needs to accept certain things about me and she told me i need to be realistic. I know exactly what she meant and i will live up to that advice. There are no failures in life. You just strive to be the best you can be and move on.

So, tonight as i drink a toast to 2009 at 7PM and then go to sleep at 10pm i will think of all of you and smile. Do not worry folks, i will not picture any of you naked or doing any crazy ass stuff. I will picture you just as you are. Beautiful and special and oh so funny!!

Girlie crush i sure hope you find what you are looking for in 2009. I have asked that you date me, but since that won't be happening i want you to date someone so special that he knocks your socks off. Or stockings or whatever your wearing that particular evening.

Sista, you work hard and you always deserve to play hard too. Our challenge starting tomorrow is going to rock. I am sure it will be full of crazy antics and perhaps some cheating but honesty is the best policy!!! Good luck sista S!!

My runner friends remember i have a running blog over at runningdowndreams. Stay here, go there totally your call. But, there you can keep abreast of my running escapades. Here, anything goes! Also, i always wanted to use the word abreast!! It makes me giggle!


Also, i'd like to thank the academy for giving me this wonderful award because i am so deserving of it. I really am so its not surprising that i did indeed win!!!



























"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up
with the rain."

FUCK YEAH!! Have a fabulous New Year. Keep it real and you know my other mantra:
Stay calm and carry on!!!!

The words on the 2nd cartoon says:
I'd like to say a few words, its been real, but i can't say i'm not glad this party is almost over! Here, here!

In Our World Of Plenty.....

First i just want to thank you all for your support and offers of contact and coming together. You all rock so much!!!

I feel 50 lbs lighter this morning. I took the advice of the people who care about me and i did what i had to do. Now, i move on never to revisit the part of my life that i just let go. 2009 is my year. It is our year. It is the year of change. Everything will fall into place. I am finally doing what is good for me not what is good for others. Not what i think others need, what i need.

I will never change who i am. I am giving, kind, compassionate, considerate and loving. I am smart and special. I never take. I give. And i give because i want to. I give because this is who i am. This is how i was raised. That part of me will never change. But what will change is how i react to situations and i will speak my mind if my feelings are hurt. I will not take crap from anybody. I will live the best way i know how. I will take care of my family and those around me who give a shit.

This past year i've met amazing bloggers who have rapidly become my friends. Each and everyone of you are special and caring. You reach out and give. You make me laugh. Thats fucking special right there folks.

THe 50 lbs i just lost will never be gained. That is how i want it. I stand by my decisions and i am proud. Do i cease to care? Of course not! I just can't be involved is all.

So, to each and every single person out there who is some small way reached out to me and made me giggle:
I love you all and i wish you a very Merry Christmas!!!! Keep in real in 09!!!

I Think I Need A New Heart...

And A New Soul.....



Magnetic Fields - I think I Need A New Heart
Hey check the out here myspace Also, i couldn't find a video of the band doing the song but i like it so bear with that lip syncing maniac up there!!!








It never fails. I am always the one left scratching my head in confusion! Confusing, upsetting situations always seem to find me. And i never know what to do. Sure, the four people who care about me suggest, NO scream at me what the right thing to do is!!!! And I know that those four people are right!!

Do i listen?? Do i think it through and realize that four people think the exact same way, yet somehow i make excuses as to why i end up doing the exact opposite?  They don't understand, those four people. My excuses are just that. Not based on any form of smart reality.

And you know what happens?? I think you do. Raw cool is always the sucker and always the one to get hurt. It never fails. At least i am consistent huh? Whats that saying??

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. I am slowly learning it doesn't happen that way, EVER!!!

Well, maybe except when you run. You can run the same route over and over again and one day you are going to do it faster. HAHA!! I just proved that theory wrong!! I ROCK!!! I am so fucking cool. HAHAHA!!

Well, IRL it just doesn't happen that way. I was warned, yelled at, looked at in confusion just today actually and still........

I am not prepared to tell the story. I just can't. Just know this...I do not know why i do what i do!

Liz Lemon here i come!! She is one of the four by the way. What would Liz Lemon do? She won't tell me. Actually, no i am wrong. Most of the time she won't tell me. In this exact instance she tells me every time i see her. It's not like her to actually tell me what to do. She never does. She wants me to learn how to decide for myself what is right for me. Except in this situation. She is pretty vehement about it too. There is no other choice she says.  Oh for those who do not know, Liz Lemon is my therapist.

Yet, here i be. Confused and stupid. Confused and a moron. Confused and hurt. Confused.

I was doing really good for a while. You know, i came to terms with things and forgot. And didn't think about it either. Damn my mind. I hate thinking. Perhaps i should pop a valium and knock myself out??? Then not only wouldn't i think, i would be unconscious!!!

I don't even know, if what i am writing makes any sense. I am just venting i suppose. I don't feel like being funny or silly. Not today.

Here is what i do not understand. Why would a person intentionally stay in a situation that is not only harmful to that person but harmful to another person. Not physically harmful, just emotional shit. Just does not make one iota of sense to me. It goes back to that insanity saying up above you know?  

If you’re practicing something and improving as you go, you are technically NOT doing the same thing over and over again. You’re doing it slightly different and better each time. If you do it exactly the same each time - that’s not practicing, that IS insanity.

If you’re conducting an experiment, then several tries to determine a result’s probability counts as “doing ONE thing”. Repeating the experiment after a failed result without changing anything would be the “insanity!! So, who is insane now???  Not me, believe me!!!

Nah i am so not insane its insane!!!







So do you want to hear what i did today that IS INSANE??? I decided to make a hot cocoa. Vanilla soy milk, agave, raw cacao and lots of cinnamon in a pot, boiled. Easy! I was all into it and excited and i poured it into my favorite orange mug. I lifted that sucker to my lips and took a taste. That fucking thing was still boiling in the cup and it slid down my tongue into my throat down my esophagus and burnt the crap out of me. I almost died a little. So, i consulted a doctor, yep i did. She told me to suck on ice!! Yep, she did. SO i sucked that ice like there was no tomorrow. Then i drank my hot cocoa. It was yummy even though my esophagus hurt likea motha fucka!!! !!! 

Lesson learned: Wait until your hot cocoa stops boiling before attempting to drink it!!!

Also, i had no idea how to spell esophagus, had to google it. But i couldn't spell it so i spelled it wrong and google helped me out!!! Thanks google!!!

I may buy a shotgun!!! I heard from a reliable source that girls are good at shooting those things!!!!

I am totally going to steal this quote from this pretty lady nikemom. She rocks and thank you!!!

Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect the best. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others. Live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you!
~ Christian D. Larson

P.S. So sorry my interviewees i haven't sent you your questions yet!!!
I suck!!!

"I Have Shpilkes In My Genecktigazoink."

Erran Baron Cohen - The Dreidel Song

It's Hanukkah tomorrow night!!! Time for some dreidel playing and potato pancake eating!!! Oh yeah baby!!





















I am a bit verklempt and for those of you who do not know what that means, i am basically choked with emotions!!! Here's why:
My family has gotten together for every single first night of Hanukkah for as long as i can remember. We always make potato pancakes complete with apple sauce and sour cream. Then we eat, hang out, exchange gifts and just have fun.

So, its snowing. Yeah so, you may ask. My mom has forbidden my sister to come to our home. She literally yelled at her and saId DO NOT COME HERE!!! We do not want you here!!! (notice how she used the word we) Hmmm, well cause the weather is bad and slippery and icy and stuff. So, my sister is not coming. This is why i feel verklempt. Just kinda sad.

So, not to weigh down this post i just wanted to wish everybody a happy first night of the festival of lights.

I'd like to include some of my favorite yiddish words and their meaning....you know just for fun!!! K?

1) Alta Kocker: literally, an old shit; or as we say in English, an old fart. (sometimes called, simply, AK)
2) Baleboosteh: (bal-a-boo-stah) an organized, efficient, praise-worthy homemaker. Also the boss-lady or boss's wife; a bossy woman.
3) Bissel: (bis-sel) A little. "Give me a bissel lox on my bagel, would you, darling?" A biselleh is even less.
4) Bubbellah: (the "u" is pronounced like the "oo" in book) an affectionate way of refering to someone, much like "darling" or "sweetheart." Bubbies call their grandchildren "bubbellah." Close friends and long-time business partners might call each other "bubbellah," or boubbie, for short.
5) Bupkis: (bup-kiss) literally, beans. Colloquially, nothing. "You're gonna sue me?! You know what you'll get!!?? Bupkis!"
6) Chazzer: (khaz-zeh) a pig or anyone who behaves like one, either in their eating, financial or personal grooming habits.
7) Draycup: literally, a turned around head. ("dray" means "turn" as in "draydl," a spinning top used at Hanukkah) Someone who's perpetually confused.
8) Fardrai zich deyn kopf!: literally, "go turn your own head around." In other words, "Leave me alone and go make yourself crazy!"
9) Gay kocken offen yom: literally, go shit in the ocean. Get lost; hit the road; beat it; piss off.
10) Shmeckel: a little penis, as on a young boy. (In baby talk, often "mekki.")
11) Shpilkes: (shpill-kiss) literally, pins. Ants in the pants, pins and needles, impatience. That feeling you have when you can't sit still from anticipation and/or anxiety. As Mike Myer's Linda Richman character would say, when she gets all worked up, "I have shpilkes in my genecktigazoink."


So, i want to just say sholem-bayes to you all!!! Oh and ikh hob dikh lib!!!!

Some funnies:

“Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.”
Henny Youngman

“I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.”
Joan Rivers

What If Christmas, Perhaps, Means A Little Bit More?

The Ravonettes - Come on Santa

I wonder. Is your man in the doghouse this Christmas?? It's not a very nice place, the dog house. Folding laundry all day long and having to endure eating quiche and chai lattes every night??? No fucking way man!!

Men do you hear us??? Do not, i repeat do not give your woman a vacuum cleaner for Christmas!!! Dual bag, schmul bag!!! Woman want thoughtful pretty smelling things that can perhaps be worn around our necks. Or dangly things that hang from our ears. Or even things where another person is allowed to touch our body and massages us. You know, girlie things!! A nice dinner complete with flowing bottles of wine would be nice. Or a day at the spa while you do all the housework and that includes cleaning the bathroom toilets.

Men, can you handle that??? I wonder! Here is what will happen to you if you do not do as i say!!! Click here doghouse and take a gander. Don't worry men, this is just a lesson for you. You will not end up in the doghouse if you follow my rules above! K???

Now, here is what i think is an appropriate Christmas gift for you men!! Check it out, i think you will love it!!! I kinda love it too!!!

















This crapping robot toilet-paper holder manages to signal your literacy and deep commitment to bowel evacuation, all in one simple package. Yeah baby!!!

So, thats my story and i am totally sticking to it!!!

Snow is falling!!!

And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.
Dr. Seuss

The First Snowflake.......

The First Snowflake from The Boy Least Likely To on Vimeo.

















Fucking Win....Our President!!!

And this guy:

















Jason O'Mara from the show Life on Mars....i am in love!! Not bad for a cell phone photo huh? They were filming 5 minutes from my home. In a russian bath house. You can see in the background, its called Royal Baths. The episode is about a russian gangster. Jason was wonderful. After i took the photo, he said to me "Hi, i'm Jason. (DUH) I say "I know who you are Jason"...said with a bit of a stutter. I had my ear flap hat on. It is confirmed. I am officially a dork.

"You're life is an occasion. Rise to it."-Mr. Magorium

Supposed To Be.....

Jack Johnson - Supposed to Be
Maybe it's up with the stars
Maybe it's under the sea
Maybe it's not very far
Maybe this is how it's supposed to be
This is how it's supposed to be
Maybe it's trapped in a jar
Something we've already seen
Maybe it's nowhere at all
Maybe this is how it's supposed to be
This is how it's supposed to be
Looking forward as we rewind
Looking back is a trap sometimes
Being here is so easy to do
If you want to

So, anyway i started this blog way back on January 19,2008 so it's coming up on 1 year. This is my 189th post. None of this is really very significant is it? Just seems like i put a lot of work into it. I am so so grateful for all my readers. I love you like dear friends. Your blogs provide me with laughter and tears and hope. All of you!

I'm just a bit at a breaking point in my life. Not quite broken but i am feeling the need for a bit of a break. There is no way this blog is ending. In fact, its just beginning with amazing things to come. I've got many great ideas and i will share them with the world, in time.

I'm tired. Exhausted really. I know i put up a front and try to make light of situations but all of a sudden it's becoming too much for me. I want to quietly become the person i know i can be. I'm not quite there yet and i need this time to get there! It's really that simple.

You can bet that no matter how long i stay away, i will be reading your blogs and leaving witty comments. It's how i roll. It's what i do! It's who i am! And you can bet your bottom dollar that come January 19, 2009 i will be mad posting on this blog. Fucking 1 year blogging anniversary! Who knew?? I sure didn't!

Interviewees, please not to worry, i am on it!!! I will send your questions to you via your private email addresses!
Here is my list:
1) Charmaine
2) Simplicity
3) Rawmom
4) Just some thoughts
5) SSP

And, i expect some kick ass answers to the questions i pose to you OK?

So, as my manicurist says:
HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS
And for my jewish friends:
MERRY HAPPY HANUKKAH

“Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave.”
Winnie the Pooh

and this

Alice laughed. `There's no use trying,' she said: `one can't believe impossible things.'
`I daresay you haven't had much practice,' said the Queen. `When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.

"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."




Eric Hutchinson - Rock and Roll

Now dance fuckers!!!!

FIVE QUESTIONS......YO!!!!

Bon Iver - For Emma
"Go find another lover;

To bring a... to string along!"

Just a good introspective song folks.

Things are as they should be.





















Don't worry or panic, i am not going to get all mystical and spout some new age shit. It's just that when your feeling badly, the only thing that can happen is eventually you feel goodly!!! Not godly folks, but goodly!





So, i am being interviewed by the ever cool and goodly blog buddy Adam Avitable. It is some sort of Five Questions Meme that went around for a while. You can see the rules down below, but he asked his readers if they wanted to participate and I volunteered. Must have been when badly things were happening to me!

So here goes.

1) Exclamation points seem to be your favorite type of punctuation. Why do you hate periods so much? .................

Before i answer this, i'd like to point out my clever use of several periods at the end of this question..
So, i believe Adam here is referring to the fact that i am indeed a woman, who menstruates on a monthly basis and this is his way of asking me if i hate having my period. Why, in fact i do! I do hate my monthly period. I do not like it one bit. It's annoying, painful at times and i think i look fat in my skinny jeans. The only and i mean only good thing about my monthly period is that means i am not pregnant. Not that i wouldn't want to be pregnant, but only when i want to be. So, to emphasis the fact that i hate periods so much, i use exclamation points to emphasis that fact.

2. What the fuck is a raw foodie?
Well, when you google raw most times you come up with some sort of porn site. Raw sex, raw love, raw lesbian action raw...well you get my point. Raw foodies fall under a whole other category of googles. Raw foodies only eat RAW food. Wow, now how hard was that to understand???? And by raw food, i do not mean raw chickens or meat??? No siree Adam. Have you ever had a green smoothie? You know you throw stuff in a blender and make sure to include something green such as spinach or kale???? Man that stuff rocks! It's freaking green and thick like sludge. You need a spoon to consume it. Then of course, about 1 hour later the gas starts and you spend the rest of the day farting and pooping! FUN!!!

3. List three reasons that New York sucks.
Only three??? Yo man this is going to be a tough one because in all honestly New York is the hippest most trendiest most amazing place on earth. Oh, sorry i digress...ok why does NY SUCK??? 1) There is NEVER any parking in New York. And if there is there are about 20 omillion signs to read to make sure your car will be there upon your return!!! Otherwise, it will be towed away to some far off land never to be found again! 2) There are admittedly more rats in New York than people! For real folks. Just go and stroll into Central Park or an underground train station. You will always be able to count more fucking big ass ugly rats than big ass ugly people!!! SCARY!!! 3) It sucks that every time i am in New York and i get lost, which happens a lot...the people i ask for directions are tourists who know more than i do!!! WTF?? I live here, yet i do not know my city!! The tourists, know my city better than i do!!! Again, SCARY!

4) What celebrity do you look like?
DUDE not really a fair and partial question...All i can say is i was once told A VERY LONG TIME AGO that i looked somewhat like Andie MacDowell. I don't see it and personally i don't care but you did ask!!!  Please no laughing.  At least not at me!!!

5. Describe your tattoos. Provide photos if you want.
Oh your dying to know aren't you!!!??? Ok, so i have five tatts. My favorite being my butterfly on my left shoulder. But, i digress....1) tribal bracelet on my right ankle with a star of david in the middle of it. 2) Sun and moon intertwined on my left ankle. 3) 2 very small hearts intertwined....4) butterfly on left shoulder 5) I will keep this one private!!!














So do you want to be part of it? (And i think you do) Follow these simple instructions but please follow through if you ask to be interviewed by raw cool....K???

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

And now i am going to open up my favorite jar of white chocolate wonderful peanut butter and settle in to watch the Iron Man Triathlon on NBC! It's all kinds of greatness at the same time!!!

Go forth my friends and be happy!!!

Raw Cool's Lament....

Barenaked Ladies - Elf's Lament
I make toys, but I've got aspirations
Make some noise
Use your imagination
Girls and boys, before you wish for what you wish for
There's a list for who's been
Naughty or nice, but consider the price to an elf

















I make toys, but I've got aspirations
Here i sit. Eating THAT!!! There was an apple involved in all the hoopla but the very main attraction was that jar of amazingly good white chocolate PB!!! Need i say more. That fucking stuff is good enough to stick your fingers in and go to work.

I need to lament. I need to say things that are filling my heart.

We choose love. We choose anger. We choose happiness. We choose boredom.
This bit of magic comes from Mr. Jason Mraz. His blog is freshnessfactorfivethousand on my blogroll. GO THERE. He freaking rocks.

So back to choices. What you choose effects your days. It effects your thoughts. It effects your life. I say mostly everything is a choice. Sure, occasionally we all make the wrong choice, but we tend to learn from those bad choices. So, those bad choices always end up positive....in a way.

I've made some really shitty choices in my life. Lots of stuff i chose not to talk about here, but mostly it has made me a better person. I always have good intentions in my head. I always think whatever i choose to do is inherently good, the better choice at that moment. Its not always the case.

It's holiday time and i feel like being alone. It's holiday time and i don't give a shit. I am a runner and i have absolutely zero desire to run. I hurt. Physically, i hurt. My shin, my back, my stomach. Am i even healthy?? I am tired of going to the same doctors who run with same tests. So, i stay away. I am afraid i am experiencing the same malady i had back in June. Same symptoms.

My mind is screaming at me. If i stop running now i will be defeated. All i worked for this year, all of it, down the drain. What for? Why would i do that to myself?

I was so very excited to be able to run and run fast. I was so psyched and happy. Now, not so much.

It's OK. Things turn around in an instant. The snap of a finger and my lamenting will turn into excitement. For now, i need to bury deep inside and think. I tend to keep the TV off these days. Except for a select few shows. I listen to the likes of Nirvana and Alice in Chains. Kurt Cobain he had it all going on didn't he??

I think i don't like people very much. I love a lot of persons but i don't very much like them. I go into the supermarket today and i asked a question to the worker....instead of showing me the excellent customer service they claim, he very rudely snickered at me and proceeded to get annoyed at what i asked him. Holy fuck!! People suck!! Why oh why can't people be nice to others??? i've learned not to flip the bird to anyone in case they have a gun and shoot me in the head.

Can you imagine? Raw cool shot because she asked where the peanut butter was!!!!



It's so sick and so fucked up!!

So, i guess my lament is over! For now!

What would Liz Lemon do? She would tell me to own up to my feelings and express them and deal with them. Try to find out why i am feeing so shitty. So, that is exactly what i am going to do.

For all you believers out there who believe in all this holiday stuff.....more power to you!!!! Enjoy, live, love and make good choices!!! Choose what is good for you and your life. Turn of the tv and get out there. You know all that bullshit, the world is waiting for you.

I do indeed have a new mantra. A new thought that pops into my head every single day that i wake up in pain. It is very very simple. I'm sure you've all heard it before, its not new. It is this:




















"Do all the good you can, and make as little fuss about it as
possible."

-- Charles Dickens


Good stuff is coming, i promise!!! Sometimes, breaks from stuff help. You'll see!!!

Never Take Friendship Personal.....

Adele - Chasing Pavements
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere










I want to talk about the year in music. What i think IMHO were the best albums of 2008. WHAT I THINK! You can totally feel free to disagree with me. In fact, i welcome a bit of back and forth amongst us. Music is so subjective isn't it? That is what i love so much about music. What i may love, you may think is poop! And thats OK! So without further ado, here is raw cools 2008 listing of what she thinks is the best of the albums of the year 2008:

10) Adele - 19 Released June 10, 2008
This album is soulful, intelligent and amazing. Adele is 20 from the UK. She was on SNL a few weeks back and blew me away!

9) TV on the Radio - Dear Science Released September 16, 2008
TVOTR are unique, innovative, it's exciting and poetic and i think i will be listening to this album for a very long time!

8) Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend Released January 29, 2008
Vampire Weekend is a breathe of very fresh air! They combine african music beats with the more well known indie pop sound and they like to call it Upper West Side Soweto. The music sounds fresh even after 10 listens and the best is that it is awesome to run to!!

7) Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago Released February 19 2008
Bon Iver (aka Justin Vernon) wrote this album himself in a rural cabin up in Northwestern Wisconsin in three months and it is chock full of emotion. Sounds like it truly came out of his heart and mind the haunting music makes listening to the album an incredible trip i'd like to take again and again.

6) Guns N' Roses - Chinese Democracy Released November 23 2008
It is something a bit new and different and i just like it is all!

5) Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes Released June 3 2008
Rich melodies and harmonies my ears feel as though they are taking flight and my heart stops beating just for a second or two! Very pleasantly surprised with this album.

4) The Raconteurs - Consolers of the Lonely Released March 25 2008
This album touches upon many different genres - punk, folk, classic rock, blues Jack White really delivers on this one!

3) The Walkmen - You and Me Released August 19 2008
It's haunting and beautiful. Listen to In the New Year and The Walkmen will quickly become one of your favorite bands.

2) The Killers - Day and Age Released November 24 2008
I appreciate the Killers because they always have something new in their music. Day and Age is mystical alternative music. This album has far exceeded my expectations if you weren't a Killers fan prior to this album you certainly will be after!

1) Coldplay - Viva La Vida Released June 11 2008
No review could possibly scratch the surface of this albums greatness!! I think they created a sound distinct to themselves. I look forward for Coldplay to mature and develop into an even better band, perhaps one of the all time greats!!

Honorable mention to
Coldplay - Prospekt's March Released November 24 2008
It is comprised of some songs that didn't quite make it to Viva La Vida. It's just beautiful. Listen to Glass of Water and Now my feet won't touch the ground. Go ahead, i dare you!!!


















I am chillin with Chris Martin. Trying to figure out the ways of the world!


Without music, life would be a mistake.
Friedrich Nietzsche



Coldplay - Yellow
I came along and wrote a song for you
and all the things you do
and it was called yellow!

Time With You....Goals And Stuff.....For 2009....Fuck Yeah...

Does it really mean anything when i say you guys rock? Does anybody even care? Not so much huh? Thats completely and totally cool in my book. Everybody is busy living their own lives and darn it, thats the way it should be.

It's pretty fucking great though, that i have made some amazing connections here. Just connections is all. No meetings or meet ups or whatever it is called these days. Just funny, crazy, nice, interesting people. People who blog. So many blogs out there too!! How do you even chose which ones to read?? Well, first you can glance to the right and take a look at my blog roll. There are the funny, crazy, nice, interesting people i talk about.

Most importantly, I look around and the first thing that i look for are blogs that make me smile, giggle or laugh out loud!!! These blogs are dear to my heart! I like laughing!! SO??

Then i look for the raw blogs. NO NO NO!!! Not porn. How many times do i have to tell you that???? Just stuff about eating raw. The newest fads and products and recipes. The greatest and best smoothies. How goji berries make you poop! What seaweed to use to make a good salad!! You know, all the normal everyday questions about being raw.

Then, of course i look for FOOD BLOGS!! Food! Glorious food. Better than sex food!!! Food that will bring me to my knees and up again. Sweets, salty you name it!!! But, no meat!! I do not put meat into my mouth under any circumstances. Nope, it won't happen. Sorry guys!!

Oh shit....how could i forget!! RUNNING BLOGS!!! Ok, here's the thing. I am not sure if many of you know this but raw cool has another blog!! Can you guess?? Wait for it.....Michelle's other blog. It's all about running. Go there. Learn a thing or two!



So, i wrote a bit about setting goals in my running blog. I think it's quite apropos being that 2009 is right around the blogging corner for all of us. Runners, unfortunately are extremely OCD and ANAL. We set goals for every single fucking thing. How many times we blow snot rockets during a run. Goals for the amount of steps we take on each run. Goals for consecutive days running. Short term goals, long term stuff....Gosh its too freaking annoying sometimes, but it has to be done.

So, right now i am 3 days into a month long running streak. I will run every single day in the month of December. And i will run on January 1st. Then i will stop. Like Forest Gump. Then i will run again. Simple.

My next goal involves mileage. In 2009 i want to run 1000 miles. I will log every single run with my garmin 405. It wirelessly sends my data to my computer. COOL???? Damn right its cool. I realize that 1000 miles sounds like a lot of mileage, but for someone like myself it is completely doable. So, i am going to do just that.

Next:
Racing.....well next Sunday i will run a 5K Jingle Bell race. Easy peasy!! I won't count that as my goals. Just a fun run.

So, in 2009 my first race will be (hopefully) NYRR Half-Marathon Grand Prix Presented by Continental Airlines: Manhattan Central Park. Sunday, January 25th 2009. You can come to Central Park to cheer me on and perhaps i will treat you to brunch afterwards??? I said perhaps!!! Doable? Perhaps!!!

I made a very cool new running friend. I will talk more about him when i meet him and run with him. All i will say is he is extremely inspiring and amazing!!!

So, what are some of your goals for 2009. For some, it may be to post to your blog every single day for a month. Or every single day for a year!! Thats cool. I need to know. GOALS people. What do you wish to accomplish in the year 2009?? There has to be something!!!

My last goal for 2009 is to maintain and possibly lose some more of my pounds. Ten more lbs perhaps will make me very happy. In one year i lost 30lbs. It was hard, tedious and exhilarating all at the same time. Now i step on that damn scale every single morning, naked, before my run. It's just something i do. Right after i tinkle. Did i mention naked? Girls, you with me here??? Guys, if your laughing at me, well HAHAHAHA!!! I hope someday you will laugh with me!!

I will be doing some blog posts about music. What i think was/is the best of 2008. Just my opinions. You can totally tell me to fuck off. Or not!!!

I am sure i am missing something. My scattered brain holds so much yet i never get it all down. Perhaps tomorrow?

"Formulate and stamp indelibly on your mind a mental picture
of yourself as succeeding. Hold this picture tenaciously.
Never permit it to fade. Your mind will seek to develop the
picture... Do not build up obstacles in your imagination."

-- Norman Vincent Peale

I Had Multiple Orgasms Yesterday.......

Coldplay - Lost
Need i say more?? They pretty much fucking rock!!! My world!
I just got lost
Every river that I've tried to cross
And every door I ever tried was locked
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off...

















So, yesterday i had something done to me that caused me to have multiple orgasms. It wasn't expected but damn, it felt good. It is not often that i can achieve multiples but yesterday was the day folks.

No, it was not that crazy black friday crap. That doesn't do it for me. In fact, its a big turn off. And no it wasn't the fact that i ran a 5 mile turkey trot on thanksgiving day. That was a single. A good single orgasm, but still just one.

What was it that gave me this unexpected pleasure?? Well, ok i will divulge the secret. Ready? Wait for it.......
I had a manicure AND pedicure SIMULTANEOUSLY!!!!! Believe me folks, this was so very amazing.

Picture this if you will:
I am sitting on this very big, very cushioned pedicure chair with an automatic back massager. The woman, lets call her pedi girl gently took my foot in her hand and started her work. Now, that in itself was pure joy and magic. Especially on feet that just ran a grueling 5 miler. Then, in the corner of my eye i see mani girl approaching. She looked as though she meant business and i wasn't able to protest. She was rough, at first. Grabbed my hand. Looked at it and as if no one was around, went to work. So, now i have both my hands and feet at the mercy of others. What to do with the rest of my body?? Should i fight them or give in? Just succumb to the magic? See, i didn't quite know because sometimes, i like to be in charge. Now pedi girl was feverishly working on my big toe. She was hitting just the right spots too. Mani girl....wow she was all like shut the heck up and let me do my thing!! So, i stopped talking, stopped fighting and sunk down into that very big chair and just let them take over. What choice did i have really?? All i felt at this point was hedonistic pleasurable sensations. (Yes, i know that hedonism and pleasure really mean the same thing, just wanted to drive the point home). When they paused for a split second, i realized they did this to heighten things. They asked "choose your color"???? Yikes? I wasn't supposed to have to think was i? So, i fumbled awkwardly to bring forth the color i wanted them to use on me. They both looked, giggled and approved. It was getting close. Almost to the point of orgasm #1. I figured once that happened i would be home free. Not so. It did happen, and it rocked my world. But, they weren't done with me. The simultaneous massaging began. One foot, one hand. My goodness. This is when i knew it was possible to have a multiple. It started happening right when they both started polishing. They looked up at me, to make sure i still wanted this color? Lincoln park after dark. I nodded approvingly and they then started finishing me up. Folks, at this point my self control melted into the massage chair. I had had it. I was spent with joy. I admiringly looked at my hands first, then my toes and sighed with a happiness i have not felt in ages. I smiled at mani girl and pedi girl as i handed them their tips. They took it eagerly and left me as fast as they came to me. On to the next. I was quickly forgotten. I felt used. I felt cheap. But, damn i felt good!!!!!

Disclaimer #1: I am not into chicks. Not that there's anything wrong with that!!! In fact chicks rock. I just prefer the non-chick kinda stuff.

Disclaimer #2: Have a sense of humor folks....OK?

Ok, so every single one of you must go here to this cool blog. His name is Adam and he is giving away this:





















That is pretty fucking cool. So, if you want to be included in the contest click on the link up above. It says here. Go there. Or not!!! Really i don't care.

I am sipping on a banana/cinnamon/almond milk smoothie admiring my nails. Life is good!!!

“Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free til they find someone just as wild to run with them.”

Sex and the City

THANKSGIVING.....UMMMM OK!!!!

Thank today whom you may not be able to thank tomorrow...Ummm OK!
Forgive today who you may not be able to forgive tomorrow....Yeah right!!

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire. But, i do!!!
If you did, what would there be to look forward to? Lots more, i promise!!!

Be thankful when you don't know something, for it gives you the
opportunity to learn. But, i know everything!!!

Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times you grow. Ummm, OK!

Be thankful for your limitations, because they give you opportunities for improvement. No limitations here!!

Be thankful for each new challenge, because it will build your strength and character. Bring it on!!

Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons. I never make mistakes!!

Be thankful when you're tired and weary, because it means you've made a difference. Ummm, OK!!

It's easy to be thankful for the good things. A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks. Setbacks huh??? Whats that?

Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive. Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings.
Trouble i love you!!!

True wealth is the blessings you see in your life. True wealth is the blessings you give to others.
True wealth is what you give, not what you have or get...Again, UMMM OK!!!

Oh And:




Oh And:

I found this on this cool blog and i thought it appropriate to post here on my blog. I think we can all easily follow the step by step instructions here to cook a perfect turkey!!!

17 Ways To Cook A Turkey

1. Go buy a turkey
2. Take a drink of whisky
3. Put turkey in the oven
4. Take another 2 drinks of whisky
5. Set the degree at 375 ovens
6. Take 3 more whiskys of drink
7. Turk the bastey
8. Whisky another bottle of get
9. Ponder the meat thermometer
10. Glass yourself a pour of whisky
11. Bake the whisky for 4 hours
12. Take the oven out of the turkey
13. Floor the turkey up off of the pick
14. Turk the carvey
15. Get yourself another scottle of botch
16. Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
17. Bless the dinner and pass out


Oh And:

My 5K Turkey Trot race - 27.55
Met my goal and surpassed it. Wanted a sub 30 minute 5K. Got that! Got a sub 28 minute 5K. Ok, it wasn't easy. AT ALL!

I was panting like a dog in heat!! My breathing was so labored that afterwards i was coughing and wheezing all day long. Still am!!! Coughing and wheezing that is. Thursday i run another one. A 5 miler. I will go easy. Then go hard. I cannot help it. Why fucking be a wuss? I want to out run the slowest runner. Its freaking Thanksgiving day!! I will get to eat like a pig afterwards. There is no stopping me.

So, lets all give thanks. To what? Whatever!!! I am not here to judge. Just have a great day and you know...EAT!!! ENJOY!!! LOVE EACH OTHER!!! Well not necessarily in that order but you get the point!!!

I LOVE YOU ALL!!!

BLOG IS OFFICIALLY CLOSED UNTIL THE WEEKEND!!!

OR

NOT!!!

I hate the fucking traffic cops.  I received a $35 ticket today, because the meter ran out literally 2 minutes before i got there!!!!   YEAH, HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!!!

That Will Not Be Me.....

The Weepies - Can't go back now
I can't really say why everybody wishes they were somewhere else
But in the end, the only steps that matter are the ones you take all by yourself.

Walk on folks. It's the only way. You can't go back now. Not now, or ever!

So, i've been thinking. How did i get to this place in my life. I am here, but i have no idea how i got here. Does it even matter? Perhaps, just to me, it does.

Everything is evolving around me. And here i sit. I am in no way complaining. I am warm and fed and healthy. Is there anything else i should ask for or strive for? Perhaps! Just not sure what that may be.

Awww, don't fret...i am not holding a pity party. I do not like those kind of parties at all. BORING!! So, none of you will ever be invited.

So, in 40 days we will be ringing in the year 2009. Pretty freaky if you think about it. We are in the future. But, the future of what? Time is fast and fleeting. You must make the most of it.

I'm all about helping out others less fortunate then myself and thanks to this wonderful lady 100daysinbed i am focused on just that. Read her suggestions. There should be something there that you can do. Anything really. It will make you feel good and it will help someone in need. Donate your old coat, for fucks sake. It's not doing anything but hanging in your closet right? I see it there. Let it go!

I couldn't care less what you choose to do. Really i don't. I care about what i choose to do. Each of you, in your own way will do something. I know it.

Last year, i spent black friday in Target. It had to have been one of the worst experiences of my life. Worse than having surgery! Worse than, well just about everything. This year, the same friend i went with last year approached me with the question i was dreading: " Wanna go shopping on black friday?" Now, i usually have trouble saying no to people. Something i am working on, by the way. So, i looked at this friend and said "FUCK NOOOOO". And that was that.

Besides, being trampled upon and people literally up my ass, i felt it to be a day of selfishness. Who could get the cheapest camera and shitty TV? Ooooh, how about some cheap looking crappy other stuff??? Oh my, look at the sale on that gorgeous, cheap crappy thing??? Go grab it!! Fuck you and all that. Pisses me off. Let's trample each other and act like wild animals all in the name of saving a buck. Woop di doo!!! Be happy with less! Anti-consumerism folks!

Ok, so i am ranting. But, please think about this. It is a holiday. A special family/friends time. A time to celebrate togetherness and love and all that bullshit. But, its not bullshit is it? Because, when it comes down to it, and i mean really down to it, that is precisely what the holiday season is. It's festive and lights and love. Thats it.

Not, lets see who can spend the most money on gorgeous cheap crappy stuff. Not, how many parties your invited too. Not, how many cocktails you can down and then make a total and utter fool of yourself dancing like this woman:



So, yeah thats scary right? Still makes me laugh though! Ok, i digress....

I already know how i am going to start off the New Year. Wait for it......a run!! Surprise, surprise right? You start January 1st off on a positive note and all good things will follow.

My judgement was a bit off this year. Honestly it was. In too many instances, i've used, not my better judgement but some sort of weird experiment judgement i must have had left over from the 80's. So, not me and very troubling. It left me scratching my head in disbelieve. But, thats all behind me now and my better judgement is back in full force. I am me again. I am who i want to be.

So, i just want to quickly talk about this film. Its called Slumdog Millionaire. I think i can safely say with confidence, that this was one of the best films i've seen in a very long time. Drama, comedy, musical, thriller, love story, and more in one transcending, riveting story. Once Slumdog launches into its final act, you'll get that pang that comes with the last chapter of a great book you wish you weren't about to finish. This film is easily one of the best of the entire year!! Go see it.

I have a give away! I have a couple of pairs of DryMax hiking socks that i would love to give away! Anybody?? Check out drymax here. I am so impressed by this company. I've been running in their socks for about 2 months now and i will never run in anything else. They are made in the good old USA! Well made and it shows.

I've got two pairs right now to give/donate to the right person. Drymax hiking high density. They are really nice and soft too!
Just leave me a comment, why you think you may want to try these socks. Thats it. Something inspiring gets me every time.




















THAT WILL NOT BE ME!!!!

What Would Liz Lemon Do???

Liz Lemon on 30 Rock

For quite some time now I've been convinced that Tina Fey is stealing my thoughts, because I've said and/or done a lot of the things Liz Lemon has said/done - exactly. Even the weird stuff, like making someone do The Worm as punishment (did that to my BFF in 9th grade, haven't had the opportunity to do it as an adult) and the bit about sitting in the dark in her nightgown watching The Love Boat and mixing together orange soda and cream soda - I seriously did the exact same thing as a kid, the I am, however, proud to say that I've never pooped my pants at a buffet, and if I did, I would not stick around for a second plate of shrimp.

And I think it's great that Liz's love life is so realistic as well, and that Tina hits all the right notes despite not really experiencing that herself (since she met her husband at a fairly young age).

I'd fashion a tin foil hat to keep her from stealing my thoughts, but she makes them so damn funny and entertaining, instead of weird and kinda depressing. Now if only I could get a Jack Donaghy in my life to mentor me and to show me how to do that thing that rich people do where they use their money to make more money...

I think there are a lot of women out there who really relate to Liz Lemon. I know I do. Everything from wanting to stay home and order in really fattening, carbo loaded food with extra bread, having trouble getting and keeping a boyfriend. Being an attractive woman, who started off life being overweight and over looked by men, who is now blossoming as a babe in her late 30's (Ok 40's) and doesn't really see it. (She'll always see herself as awkward) When Jack told Liz that the reason why he likes her is because she is weird and a social retard, I screamed..."SO AM I!". In fact, I had a friend once who said that to me, and it stuck.

I don't know, i guess i have some sort of girlie crush on Liz Lemon. She's really hysterical. So, here's the thing:
My therapist, her name is Liz. So, ok wait for it........wait for it......wait for it......
I call her Liz Lemon! Sheesh, that was like waiting for a fart to come and go!

It's pretty cool because she thinks its funny and allows me to call her Liz Lemon. Not sure what that says about her either but i find it pretty freaking rad!!

So, when i find myself in situations where i literally have no clue what to do, i stop and think to myself "What the fuck would Liz Lemon do???" I do. Would she date that guy? Would she eat that crappy cupcake? Would she spend her last dollars on nail polish?? Would she?

Probably not, but i do!! But, just stopping and thinking things through makes an incredibly big difference in what i would do in more treacherous situations. I won't subject you to the perilous ridiculousness of my days, but lets just say sometimes i need guidance.

Fucking Liz Lemon, she rocks!! I don't know how many of you are in any form of therapy and i am not asking, but i am and i am proud. Here is the way Liz Lemon describes it:
You have 50 minutes to talk about whatever the fuck you want to talk about and I Liz Lemon will give you my undivided attention even if you bore me to tears!!! Even if you talk about ridiculous stuff that i've heard 1000 times before. Even if you ask me how fat you look or if i like your shoes or if your nail polish matches your shirt!!! Yep, i will listen! But, i will listen even more attentively if you bribe me with Starbucks lattes and a cupcake once in a while.

Yes, isn't she special? I think so!!!

So, i wanted to ask you guys a question....this should be fun.

So lately, I've been obsessively erasing my google search history, because I'm worried someone will find a weird list of searches similar to "singles yoga" and "scalp pain" when they use my computer.

Here are three things i searched for on google:

• Things prohibited from mailing
  
• yorkshire pudding
  
• world's best cake donuts
  

I...am going to go hang my head in shame. Then go eat a donut!  Notice how 2 out of the 3 are food related.

So, i am asking...what are some of your google searches?  I am so very curious!  

Oh, just to ease your minds, lots of my google searches involve stuff like:

• How to get your mojo back (dude i was asking for a friend)
• What is mojo??
• How to make a mojo mojito?
• Is there scotch involved?
• When you have mojo does everybody see it?

So, yeah those are the normal ones?  The ones i am not mortified to admit!  So, lets have it folks!!!  I want to know your googles searches!!!  Come on, play along nicely!!

So, i will leave you with this great photo! The two people on earth i have crushes on right now!! Jon Hamm and Liz Lemon...ooops i mean Tina Fey!

Dating???? Stay tuned. It may be real!!! Or not!

Liz: Whoa, excuse me, there's a line, buddy.
Man: There's two lines.
Liz: No. No, there's one line; we're in it.
Man: I'm just getting a hot dog.
Liz: We're all getting hot dogs! What, you think there's two lines and we're all in this line? You're the only genius who got in the other line? Can you believe this guy?

So, Let's Get On With It....Being Bad Feels Pretty Good...

No Doubt - Running
Sometimes it's hard to keep on running
We work so much to keep it going
Don't make me want to give up

















I ran a 10K today. Solitary. 6.2 miles. You can see the stats up there. 1 hour 45 seconds. I burned 735 calories and i ran a 9.48 pace overall.

I was 46 seconds away from my goal of running a sub 1 hour 10K. Now, i know that to most 46 seconds is merely 46 seconds, but not to me. To a runner, 46 seconds is a lifetime. I will not regale you with stories about how windy it was. But, it was. Or how the sun was beating down on my cap covered face! But, it did. I won't tell you how about 3 miles in, i dropped my ipod. But, i did that too.

So, i am not sure now if i should go out on every run with a goal in mind. In races its unheard of not to have some sort of goal simmering in the back burners of your mind. You don't tell anybody for fear of having to, well regale them with the stories of why you came in 46 seconds late of your goal.

Shit, it happens. I am not upset with myself for running a 1 hour 45 sec 10K. Nope, thats not it at all. What i am upset at is the utter and complete pressure i put on myself. It takes away from the fun of the run. From feeling free and light and relishing the wind on my face! From taking away the time to, you know, look at the ocean and breath in the salty air. Or to take the time to stop and pet that cute doggie i always see.

Yeah, whatever. It's all good. Setting goals can be a good thing. Gives you focus and determination.

It's all in how you put things in perspective you know:

37 miles per gallon

Created by The Car Connection

I am a fucking hybrid. All the cool kids are driving hybrids.

And i will end with a meme! This one is rather cool.

• My uncle once: took me swimming when he knew i couldn't swim and sort of put me under water for way longer than a 6 year old should be.  I didn't like it.  To this day, i am not a fan of swimming!

• Never in my life: have I set out to hurt someone, including someone who's hurt me.

• When I was five: I thought i could fly to the moon.

• High school was: better than I thought it was at the time.

• I will never forget:  When i lost my virginity!!  HAHA!  Got ya!  No, ok so i will never forget how i felt the first time i went running.  I hated it!!

• Once I met: Tom Hanks on the boardwalk.  He was doing a magazine shoot.  Extremely nice man even though i stood there like a babbling idiot!

• There’s this girl I know: who is a gorgeous special person who is trying hard to live life!

• Once at a bar: I found a $20 bill on the floor under my table. I kept it, of course.

• By noon, I’m usually: writing, or working for my friend.  Editing.

• Last night: I couldn't go to sleep because i ate about 15 brussel sprouts and well, you know what happens.  

• If I only had:  The new Mac book that came out 3 months after i bought the one i currently have!

• Next time I go to church: it'll probably be to see some sort of concert.  I don't go to church.  

• What worries me most:  How much longer my mom can do her thing!  She's slowing down.

• What I miss most about the 1980s is:  The music i guess!

• If I were a character in Shakespeare, I’d be: Puck, from A Midsummer Night's Dream.

• A better name for me would be:  Dorkness

• I have a hard time understanding:  Quantum physics.

• If I ever go back to school: it won't be for grades, but simply to learn things like architecture, philosophy and astronomy.

• You know I like you if: I hug first.

• Take my advice, never:  Leave your house without your ipod or some form of music.

• My ideal breakfast is: coffee, oatmeal with various toppings, and fruit.  Always fruit.

• If you visit my hometown, I suggest you: visit the coney island boardwalk and ride the cyclone!

• Why won’t people: just pipe down, have a beer, and relax?

• The world could do without:  People who hate on others.

• My favorite blonds are:  Marilyn Monroe and Barbara Eden.

• If I do anything well, it’s: letting people be who they are.

• And by the way: I like memes like this one.
  

So, last but not least. I have projects in the works. Just needed to put that out there for the universe. My next post will be entitled "What would Liz Lemon do"? It will be all about attitude. Yeah, so what? I have attitude. It's going to be a good one so stay tuned.

"If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary." ~ Jim Rohn