Sunday, January 18, 2009

REASONS NOT TO BE AN IDIOT......POST #207 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY POST!


Frank Turner - Reasons not to be an idiot

You're not as messed up as you think you are
Your self-absorption makes you messier
Just settle down and you will feel a whole lot better
Deep down you're just like everybody else

She's not as pretty as she thinks she is
Just picture her after she's had kids
I bet she sits at home and listens to The Smiths
Deep down she's just like everybody else

So why are you sat at home?
You're not designed to be alone
You just got used to saying "no"
So get up and get down and get outside
Cos it's a lovely sunny day
But you hide yourself away
You've only got yourself to blame
Get up and get down and get outside

He's not as clever as he likes to think
He's just ambitious with his arguing
He's crap at dancing, yeah and he can't hold his drink
Deep down he's just like everybody else

I'm not as awesome as this song makes out
I'm angry, underweight and sketching out
I'm building bonfires on my vanities and doubts
To get warm just like everybody else

So why are you sat at home?
You're not designed to be alone
You just got used to saying "no"
So get up and get down and get outside
Cos it's a lovely sunny day
But you hide yourself away
You've only got yourself to blame
Get up and get down and get outside

Amy thinks that life is lacking in drama
So she fell for horoscopes, faith-healing and karma
She's so wrapped up in her invisible armour
She'll never grow into herself
And it's OK thinking me and all my friends are just wasters
But saying that I can still see through her heirs and graces
I bet she's scared her life won't leave any traces
Caught up like everyone else

That's not the point anyway
Oh darling, I felt compelled to call you up to say...
So why are you sat at home?
You're not designed to be alone
You just got used to saying "no"
So get up and get down and get outside
Cos it's a lovely sunny day
But you hide yourself away
You've only got yourself to blame
Get up and get down and get outside
Get up and get down and get outside

I would be remiss if i didn't mention how major and important tomorrow is. January 20, 2009, after 8 very very long years we will have a new president. Interesting tidbit: Barack Obama becomes 44th President at 12 noon on January 20 whether he took the oath of office or not! I am not sure i can explain to you how amazing i think that is. I have very high hopes for Mr. Barack Obama!!! This man is change. This man is our future. This man is hope. This man is the change we so desperately need. As i write this i feel my American pride spilling forth. We live in the greatest country on earth....I know somedays it doesn't seem that way. With all the unemployment and financial losses that people have been going through. With the poverty and homelessness. With the horribly high cost of health insurance to the increasingly worrisome health care we have. It certainly can seem bleak. But, Mr. Barack Obama is on it. It may not happen in his first term, but he is fucking on it. This is history in the making and i for one, will be tuning in tomorrow to see Obama sworn in as our 44th president.























So, back to today. January 19, 2008 at approximately 8.10PM Raw Cool hit the publish button for her very first post. She had no idea where this journey would take her. Would she even make it a year. Would anybody read her blog? What the fuck would she even write about??

So, yes i made it a year. Yes, i have a few readers. I have no clue what i write about. I just know i write from my heart. So what if my heart holds the words fuck, shit and poop. So fucking what?? My heart also holds the words, thank you, i love you, i appreciate you and fuck yeah!!! Plus so much more!!

I am very much grateful for all of you. You have made me a stronger, more caring person who actually thinks perhaps i can do the things i set out to do. My goals, dreams, hopes....i just feel it because of you guys. I gained confidence and self esteem. I gained friends. Friends who don't pretend. Friends who are honest and giving and loving. Friends who give a shit. You all fucking rock!!

I was once very horribly told this:
This way you can be whomever you wish to be and appear in different personalitles to gain friends. Without the validation of others, you appear to be nothing. Insecure and lost. No meaning. Rant all you want. It is meanless and quiet honestly, who really cares? People read your blog for amusement purposes only. Do they really care about you?


This, by the way came to me in the form of a comment right here on my blog about 2 months ago. It never saw the light of day. Until now. When i read it, i almost threw up a little in my mouth at the shear anger and meanness that spew forth. This is some of the toxic shit i was dealing with. That, and so much more. You may guess that the word narcissist popped up in this persons repertoire. I had trouble sleeping. I felt sick to my stomach. I was told i was not a nice person because i used the word fuck. I could go on and on. But, i won't. It's over. Perhaps, i learned the hard way. But, i learned.

When i shared the horrible comments with Liz Lemon, she saw how upset i was. How confused i got. How troubled i became. She went through it all with me. She is my savior. My go to person for all things troubling. But, she has taught me things. She has taught me the value of being a good person. She has taught me so much. Each time i see her, i realize just how much i am a giving, supportive, functioning person. So, thank you LIz Lemon. You fucking rock!!

I want to give a shout out to my sista S!! She has been there for me. She is supportive and helps me. She is my family. She is my soul sista. My friend. Thank you Sista S. You fucking rock.

So, last year was a turning point for me. And this year, i will go far. Or not. Doesn't matter now to me. I am no longer filled with dread when i look at my comments. Because, now i get wonderful, positive, funny, supportive, amazing comments. Not that shit filled hate. Like i said in my last post, i am sleeping like a baby now. I mean sure i have bad nights, but for the most part, there is no more tossing and turning.

My running is improving and i feel very proud of myself. If somebody hurts me with words or bad thoughts, i move on and fast!!! But, here is my promise to all of you...i will no longer harp on this. It is over to me. As the song says
I am going to make it through this year
If it kills me
I am going to make it through this year
If it kills me

I love you all!

Ok, don't worry i fully intend to be alive and well and post a 2 year anniversary post on January 19, 2010.

The Outdoor Type - The Lemonheads

Always had a roof above me
Always paid the rent
but I`ve never set foot inside a tent
Can`t build a fire to save my life
I lied about being the outdoor type

i`ve never slept out underneath the stars,
the closest that i came to that was one time my car
broke down for an hour in the suburbs at night
i lied about being the outdoor type.

Too scared to let you know you knew what you were looking for
I lied until I fit the bill god bless the great indoors
I lied about being the outdoor type
I`ve never owned a sleeping bag let alone a mountain bike

i can`t go away with you on a rock climbing weekend
what if somethings on tv and its never shown again
its just as well i`m not invited i`m afraid of heights
i lied about being the outdoor type

Never learned to swim can`t grow a beard or even fight
I lied about being the outdoor type

"Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you
just sit there."

-- Will Rogers
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